The Victor’s perspective Vs the Vanquished
Victor:
The ground began to shake. Birds sprang from the branches of trees in a state of panic as the huge figure crawled out from under the earth. The giant smashed trees into the ground and flung them aside, making his way into the building for revenge. Suddenly a masked hero leaped onto the giants back and with a single swing of his sword, he lobed off the creatures head. The man was a hero, he was destined for glory and riches, he would go down in history. OR WOULD HE…
Vanquished:
The ground began to shake. I would finally be free of my prison and I would take my revenge on the man who trapped me there. I felt good as I carefully moved some trees aside for me to pass. Suddenly I felt a tiny person on my back, they crawled along with the slightest movement, but then I suddenly felt the sharpest pain and then nothing. Although i knew i could not get revenge on this masked murderer i knew that my family surely would. OR WOULD THEY...
Kia ora Cole,
ReplyDeleteI really like that you are keeping the readers in suspense, I would love to read more of this story to find out what happens. You have also done a good job using punctuation in your writing. Make sure to re-read through what you have written to make sure you haven't missed anything, like a capitol letter.
Keep up the active blogging!
NJ
Hi Cole, thanks for sharing your writing with us. I really like your descriptive language choices - I can imagine what this would look like in a short film. I agree with NJ, it's great how you have left the reader wondering what would happen next. You can be proud of this work Cole.
ReplyDelete